Understanding

Steve Haziran 05, 2022

Understand that not everything is meant to be understood. Live, let go, and don't worry about what you can't change. (Photo credit: deeplifequotes)

No man is truly married until he understands every word his wife is NOT saying. Unknown.

Years ago I knew an older couple who had been married many years and had spent most of those years working together on the road. I traveled with them for a couple of years and got to know them very well. Something I began to notice after a while was when they'd be talking they'd often finish each others sentences.

Actually it was mostly the wife that would finish out what the husband might be saying. I think women are more often more in tune to understanding what their spouse is thinking. Men don't always seem to do so well with that talent. But this man did seem to be tapped in pretty well to the nuances of his wife's needs. They seemed like such a perfectly matched couple.

Seeing how it was for them, I hoped that one day I might have a similar type relationship with a wife. I've yet to be in a relationship that long lasting and doubt whether I will with my age being what it is. I don't always understand everything my wife is thinking or wants, but I am getting better. One thing I can see pretty readily is when she's not happy about something. I may not know what the problem exactly is, but the icy message is now easy for me to sense.

It wasn't always that way. Sometimes I'd just go along thinking everything was fine and then she'd just explode because I hadn't responded in some way that she was hoping for--my understanding was not acute. Now I'm better. I can catch that hint of a brewing Arctic emotional breeze before it turns into a gale of anger.

Now I'll remind her to make sure she lets ignorant me know when she wants something from me. But my radar of understanding is now more finely attuned to her inner emotions. I watch and listen. And now she knows more of what to expect from me. I guess we're turning into an old married couple with a lot more understanding than we used to have.

There are some advantages to growing older. Greater understanding is one of them.

How good are you at reading body language and picking up on nuances of the unspoken words? Has your understanding of relationships improved over the years? Do you think you have a good understanding of the opposite sex?